Inner peace, authenticity and living in alignment with our values is the new inner peace.

There’s a unique grieving process that happens when we reconnect with past versions of ourselves. We are reminded of the lessons we learned, challenges we overcame, and the pain associated with living from a place of misalignment. It sheds light on what matters most to us, how much we’ve evolved.

Every time I visit my family home in the Bay Area, I experience this grieving process intimately. I stroll through my old neighborhoods, past my favorite restaurants, former date spots, and bars I frequented, often holding back tears. I watch other working professionals pass by, coffees and briefcases in hand, and I remember past me thinking they all had it figured out. How I used to feel like I had so little figured out.I wish I could go back and hold that younger version of me, tell her that the answers are not in some society rulebook that everyone seems to have but her. The answers have been within her all along. I wish I could calm her fears and doubts, let her know that wanting a different path is not only ok, but will lead her somewhere beyond what she could’ve ever imagined.

I remember the first time I saw the quote: “Inner peace is the new success.” It sparked a moment of deep introspection, and inspired me to pause and reflect on the evolution of my definition of success.

When I think back to the version of me who lived and worked in the Bay Area, she equated success to excelling in career and climbing that corporate/tech ladder to reach career stability, money $$$: the “standard” version of success. I thought that reaching the top tier of the ladder, high-income levels, and prestigious titles would give me a seal of societal approval, and a feeling of enough-ness.

At that time, societal “should”s characterized my idea of success. I “should” be going after that next promotion. I “should” be at this place in my career by now. I “should” have it all mapped out.

The irony is that it took leaving those “should”s behind for good, stepping out of my comfort zone, and leaping away from all that I knew to fully understand what success meant to me. Early career burnout, leaving the US, traveling abroad, and meeting people with drastically different outlooks and priorities, finally led me to a definition of success that felt authentic to me.

My evolved definition? Success is waking up every morning and working towards something far bigger than myself. It’s staying true to my values and approaching every situation with genuine curiosity. Success is the inner peace that comes with being, doing, speaking, and living in harmony with my authenticity. It is constant learning, growth, expansion, and a purpose-driven life. That is success for me.

So I encourage you to shed the layers of outside noise and reflect within.

• What is success to you?
• How does that look and feel to you?
• How are your actions, goals, and aspirations aligning with your version of success?

Follow that. Celebrate the peace that comes when you align with your version. Remember, your definition is the most important definition of all. So, as I look up at my old San Francisco apartment’s bay window with tears in my eyes, I hold space for that past version of me. I allow myself to grieve for her. The perfectionist, career-driven Kristin, unfulfilled and burnt out from going after something she didn’t even want.

And I celebrate the new, calm, peaceful, and balanced Kristin. She holds that former version of herself close, telling her all is going to be ok and thanking her for learning to follow her inner voice. She’s striving for something far beyond herself and hoping to create meaningful change in this world. She feels fulfillment and inner peace and follows it.

She keeps evolving, staying open to how success evolves for her. She knows she is whole, she knows she is worthy.