Do you ever make promises to yourself on Sunday night to start a new routine, put yourself out there and finally make headway on bringing that one dream you can’t stop thinking about to life… only to abandon your efforts by Tuesday? Do you find yourself committing to things and canceling at the last minute or overly saying ‘yes’ even though deep down you know it’s a ‘no’? 

We’ve all been there – think of the forgotten New Year resolutions lost in a journal at the bottom of your storage, or the “We need to get together!”s that never materialized. 

While it might be easy to brush these off at the moment, keeping your word is an important part of building trust in your relationship with yourself and others. When we have deep self-trust, we develop more confidence, authenticity, and self-belief. Being able to trust yourself bolsters your decision-making, overall well-being, and happiness. When we can be trustworthy in relationships, we open up the possibility of experiencing deeper, more fulfilling relationships and connections.

I like to think of our words as promises to ourselves and the people around us. Promises to care for ourselves, to show up for the things we said we would do, or to be the person we want to become. Each time we honor these promises, and our words, desires, and actions are in alignment, we are communicating to ourselves and the people around us that we can be trusted. When we break these promises, we damage, weaken, or sometimes even lose that trust.

But remember, the key to trust isn’t just honoring your word… it’s also knowing your limits. When we have people-pleasing or perfectionism tendencies, we may find ourselves over-committing ourselves and saying ‘yes’ without a second thought or piling our plates with so many ‘to-do’s that it would be impossible to finish everything to the standard we set for ourselves. Self-trust is a dance between staying in tune with your body and capacity and communicating these limits and expectations with those around you. 

So, if you are looking for deeper self-trust or signs that you aren’t sticking to your word (and what to do about it), I’m here to help. 

Not honoring your word to others can look like:

• Changing or canceling plans at the last minute
• Committing to attend events and not showing up
• Overcommitting to work obligations

Not honoring your word with yourself can look like:

• Promising to start new habits and not following through
• Complaining but staying with a toxic partner
• Setting goals and taking no action

How can I ensure I honor my word?

1. Deepen your self-knowledge and awareness. Understand what is and what isn’t aligned for you. Get to know your limits and what you can realistically commit to before making promises.
2. Communicate clearly to yourself and others. Set appropriate expectations of what you can honor so you don’t overextend yourself or burnout.
3. Set boundaries and prioritize them. Learn to say ‘No’ to what isn’t for you so that you can honor your ‘Yes’ to what is.

Remember to start small. Think tiny, easy-to-keep promises and build from there. I encourage you to start a daily ‘Promise List’: Write out daily the promises you make to yourself and others. Check off and honor these promises, and use the times you don’t as feedback on your moment-to-moment capacity. Witness the power of honoring your word and deepening self-trust.

This practice isn’t always easy and takes repetition. However, with consistent effort, honoring your word becomes easier and a powerful tool for your trust and meaningful connection toolkit.

And, if you are needing support on your journey to honoring your word, I would love to support you! I recently updated my offerings, have a look at them by clicking the button here.